Welcome to my home page
This page is still under development. When you next pop in, things should, hopefully, be better. And, possibly, a little more fulfilling.
Hi! My name is Richard Wong, and this is my ..errr.... my home page (....ahem, sorry about that.....)
I do apologise if is not as impressive as it is supposed to be. Soon as I can get around to gathering up all those loose flakes of HTML that is now roaming freely around up there inside the old grey matter - like it is nobody's business - this place will be the hottest yet. Soon.....
To tell the truth, when I first started, I wanted to put down a lot of stuff about myself on this page. Now that I am actually doing it, I find I do not really know what to put - I mean, what should I put down that is exciting enough to attract lots and lots of webbies.
I could put down a nude picture or two - but, unfortunately, (or fortunately - depending on your state of mind), I do not have a great body, so that one is out.
I could put down a picture of my mother-in-law, but she would beat me up no end, so that one is also out.
I could put down a picture of my dog, but then, everybody would want to get to know him and no one would bother to read my home page. That is definitely OUT.
I could write down all the exciting things that happened in my XXX - number of years withheld - 1.) for confidentiality, and 2.) from unscrupulous feng shui masters (well, not all - only the ones with the ulterior motives) - years of existence, but then, who, in their right mind, would want to read about the exciting thing in another person's life?
Well, actually, now that I am thinking about it, lots of people do - I guess. Otherwise the tabloids would all be newspapers.
Which brings me to another problem. I do not have ready a written record of my life's greatest achievements. This serious inadequacy will not do. Needs immediate resolving.
So, armed with a dozen pencils, a Minnie Mouse eraser taken from my niece when she wasn't looking, a ream of writing paper, and a two litre bottle of coke, I sat down and proceeded to review all the exciting events that happened over the XX years of my being.
By the time the profound introspection was over, I had filled in half a page. I have, as left over, eleven pencils plus one that is only three-quarters long (the first quarter broke off when I started writing), four hundred and ninety-nine and a half sheets of paper, no more eraser, and two buckets of sweat.
p/s: I hope my niece will not notice the missing eraser.
I studied that half filled page. My 7 year old cousin can write better and longer in his English compositions. I knew that there must have been a minor mistake made somewhere. Gulping down my sister's carrot juice (she says it keeps her eyes bright), it dawned on me that I had been profoundly introspecting the wrong superlative all this while. I was profoundly introspecting my greatest achievements. I should really be profoundly introspecting all achievements, both great and small.
I think I may now have just about enough material for a biography, though it would be a pretty thin one. The contents are definitely not as tantalising as that of Monica Lewinsky's. Now, if I try hard enough, I can probably find somewhere a gullible enough publisher who does not also believe in "having strings attached".
Being a staunch born-again christian, I always say a little prayer to the lord for his guidance before I start out on anything. Asking for guidance and knowing that HE will provide dislodges all the naggings of doubts, worries and whatnots too commonly associated with starting something new. Now, with my mind free from all such pessimistic negativities, I can employ 100% cranial power to the job at hand. Well, 90% actually. The other 10% has already a full time job processing much more complicated issues such as snacks and food and drinks and what's for lunch and the like.
Having faith that HE will provide also gives me the peace of mind that no material possessions can ever provide. This is especially true in these days of trials and tribulations, war and famine, two-legged crocodiles, unscrupulous feng shui masters, dogs eat dogs and, God forbid, the occasional man (i.e. if they are hungry enough and are confident they can get away with it).
And p/s: I do not have to empty too many buckets too.
I have email coming in now and then from people wanting to know what is the picture of the monkey doing at the top of the page. I have to tell them - quite unabashfully, of course - that it really is a picture of me.
Some of them wrote back to say that this a little hard to believe and was I joking. In circumstances like this, what else can we humble folks tell them - except to go have their monitors fixed at reputable computer outlets, and do pay attention when mummy keeps on about those fly-by-night operations.
SELECT THE TOPIC YOU WANT TO SEE:
1. Exciting moments in my life. (p/s this link does not work yet).
3.
Thanks for dropping in. Do let me know your comments/opinions about this site, alright?.
You can email me your problems and insecurities (if any): Contact me => [email protected]
(S. & G.E.)
(Spelling & Grammar Exempted)
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